Our Courage, Chapter Eight

That night, Yamato couldn’t sleep.

Yuuri’s hand had been cold? Impossible...

Images from the day he had met Yuuri until now flashed through his head. At a time when everything in Less-Than city had taken Yamato aback, Yuuri had been the boss. Having the only gun, she’d been in control.

But Yuuri hadn’t been doing it only for herself. She’d used the deliveries she took to take care of the smaller children who couldn’t get any supplies for themselves.

That was the kind of person Yuuri was. Seemingly gruff and nihilistic, but in truth more gentle than anyone, more wounded than anyone, and more concerned about everyone in this village. That was the Yuuri that Yamato wanted to see smile again.

That guy Reiji had died two days after his hands turned cold. Did that mean Yuuri only had two days left?

It couldn’t be true, it couldn’t be -

He couldn’t quench the fear, and a sorrow began to spread in Yamato’s chest.

*

In the Headquarters, a tape was playing of a DJ’s cheerful voice being interrupted by a desperate cry. It was a recording of Yamato’s attempt to contact the outside world. But -

“There were some inquiries about the message, but we explained it as a prank.”

“This has gone too far,” the vice-minister’s eyes glittered.

A secretary stood and began to read a report.

“The Makuhara T-virus is caused by an organism, that causes death by preventing cell regeneration in the human body.”

“If that’s so, why is it only children can survive it?”

“There is an area of the DNA called Telomere that calculates age. As it replicates, the count becomes shorter. Our hypothesis is that the Telomere causes so much cell death that the infected person dies around the age of twenty.”

“Have you found a cure?”

“... No, not yet.”

As the other members of the board lowered their heads, there was a razor-edged gleam in the vice-minister’s eyes.

*

A cold north wind blew in that felt like it could peel your skin off.

Mori and Takeru stood by the school’s play equipment, unsmiling.

“Hey, Takeru, is Yuuri going to die? Is there anyway we can stop it? What should we do?”

Looking at Mori as he thought for a moment, Takeru finally opened his mouth. “Act normal, just keep doing what you always do.”

“I don’t know if I can...” Mori muttered.

Takeru didn’t know either. His heart was filled with worry, he wanted someone he could rely on.

But... Takeru corrected himself

That couldn’t be his biggest concern right now. More than that, he needed to be someone Yuuri herself could depend on. She couldn’t have the slightest idea of their concern. They had to show her that everything was normal. If that was the only thing he could do for her...

He entered the music room with heavy tread. Yuuri was alone, lying on the sofa and staring at a point in space.

“What is it?” she said, looking at his trying-to-look-natural expression.

“No-nothing, really, I was just wondering how you were.”

“What do you mean?”

“Just, you know, your condition...”

“I’m so-so,” she said, with the same expression as always.

Yamato also came in, seeming as if he also was worried about her.

“What is it?” she looked at both of them.

“Nothing in particular, just wondering how you were doing,” Yamato said, before Takeru dragged him away.

He muttered in the hallway, “Stop acting so strange!”

“Huh?” Yamato responded, looking at Takeru askance.

“Don’t come talking to her without any reason.”

“You did it, too.”

“Yeah, but...” Takeru said, and fell silent. He looked straight at Yamato as though deciding something. “Yamato?”

“Yeah?”

“Did you notice?” Yamato stared back, not getting Takeru’s meaning, and Takeru smiled bitterly. “No, you wouldn’t have. You’re too thick.”

*

When Yamato walked out into the schoolyard, he saw Suzuko doing laundry by herself. She smiled when she saw him.

“It’s going to be Christmas soon. Do you remember last year?”

Christmas? It was that season already... Yamato had totally forgotten. In this town, they were literally trying to survive day to day. Things like Christmas and New Year’s had nothing to do with survival.

But Yuuri might never see another Christmas.

Unaware of Yamato’s dark thoughts, Suzuko kept chattering.

“I was late for my curfew when we missed the last train, and my dad got so angry, yelling, “What time do you think it is!?” and you told him, “I don’t have a watch so I don’t know.” And he said, “Stop kidding around!”

Just then, Yuuri wandered by them with an vague air. She carried a white plastic bag, and her steps were uneven, as though each took all of her strength.

Yamato looked after her as she went, and Suzuko watched him do so.

*

Yamato caught up to Yuuri and took the bag from her. Inside were several glass bottles filled with gas.

“I’m going to burn it down, everything,” Yuuri muttered.

“If you start a fire, you’ll get shot at.”

“Don’t care. I’m going to die anyways. Doesn’t matter if it happens fast or slow.”

“Yuuri... you know?”

“It’s not like I wouldn’t figure it out I thought about what I could do for everyone, and this was the only thing.” She looked straight ahead, and spoke matter-of-factly.

“Why are you talking about this kind of thing?”

“Isn’t it hard for you? You were betrayed, isn’t it painful?”

“I guess, yeah, it was hard.”

“So that’s why, if I stayed silent and did nothing, it would be painful.”

Her tone and expression were gentle, but Yamato thought there must be a fire burning inside her.

“I’m not going to let you go through with something this dangerous.”

She said firmly, “There’s something I have to do.”

“What is it?”

“Get revenge on my mother’s enemy. She was killed... by Shibasaki...”

“Huh?” Yamato gasped. Yuuri’s enemy... was Shibasaki himself?

But suddenly, all the power left Yuuri’s body, and she swayed as though she were about to collapse. Without thinking, Yamato put an arm around her and held her up. She was freezing against his fingertips.

“I can’t let it go any more... I can’t die leaving it like this...” Yuuri murmured as though delirious to a stunned Yamato.

*

“Yuuri’s mother’s enemy?” Takeru’s voice raised in surprise.

Yamato, looking at Yuuri as she lay unconscious on the music room’s sofa, nodded. “I’d been thinking what to do to help Yuuri.”

“But talking about revenge...”

“It’s not like I’m going to kill Shibasaki. I couldn’t.”

“Then what?”

“I’ll get him to apologize to her,” Yamato said as though he’d been thinking hard, and Takeru scoffed.

“They’re not little kids, here.”

“It’s all I can do. I can’t let her do anything dangerous, so I’ll go.”

Saying this Yamato started to leave, but Takeru called him back.

“Wait a minute.”

“What for?”

“There is something else you can do for Yuuri.”

At Takeru’s words, Yamato looked back at him questioningly.

“Yuuri... likes you.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Yamato said with a small laugh.

“It’s not a joke, it’s the truth,” Takeru said, and took hold of Yamato’s shoulder with a serious expression. For a second, Yamato stood still as though struck by lightning. He remembered the day he’d first met Yuuri. That was right, he’d thought she was a woman until her words, “I’m not a girl,” and rewrote her representation of herself, and from those words until now he’d accepted that as the reality, but...

Knowing Yuuri’s hidden feelings for the first time, Yamato could only be silent.

“So because of that, if you could stay with her. And... if you could like her back. I’m asking you,” Takeru spoke as though the words were painful.

Troubled with his own thoughts, Yamato shook his head firmly. “I can’t do it.”

“Even if you have to lie, it’s fine,” Takeru said.

With a troubled expression, Yamato answered him, “Yuuri wouldn’t be happy if I did something like that. If that’s how she really feels.”

“I get it. But at least, could you stay with her?” Takeru’s voice was pleading. But Yamato only shook his head once more.

“I have to do this the only way I can.”

*

That night.

Yuuri regained consciousness, and found Suzuko sitting next to her.

“I guess you’re feeling sick?”

Suzuko didn’t know about Yuuri’s fate yet.

“No, it’s nothing,” Yuuri answered.

Suzuko showed her a bracelet she was wearing. “Yamato gave this to me, last Christmas.”

Yuuri looked at it without words. Suzuko kept talking as though she didn’t know what else to do.

“I gave him a sweater. Then, on his birthday - “

“Why are you telling me about this?”

At Yuuri’s question, Suzuko looked at her with steady eyes.

“I like him, Yamato,” Suzuko said, biting her lip, and looked up at the ceiling for an instant. “I don’t want to lose him to you.”

Suzuko had figured it out, that Yuuri was a girl the same as her, that she also had fallen in love with Yamato -

Yuuri stared at the ceiling silently, but a cynical smile flickered on her mouth.

“Have you got the wrong idea about something? I have no interest in Yamato.”

“Really?” Suzuko’s face grew bright.

“I don’t have the same tastes as you,” Yuuri said, and smiled again. But this time it came from deeper within her, and Suzuko returned it.

*

As Suzuko left the music room, Takeru entered carrying a blanket.

Yuuri was trying to lit up a cigarette, but her hands trembled so much she couldn’t hold the match.

Takeru took it from her hand, and went to lit it for her. But suddenly, she threw the cigarette away, and pulled the bandana from her head. Her long hair tumbled down.

She was clearly upset. The feelings as a girl that she’d kept secret, the desperate feeling of one’s own body falling apart, they were eating at her.

Takeru looked at her like this, and couldn’t find the words to say.

She noticed his unhappy expression, and gave him her best effort at a smile. “Don’t give me that look. You don’t get it? When we become adults, we die. I understand that. It’s okay, it’s nothing to be scared of.”

“Yuuri...” Her smile now was the cruelest thing he’d ever seen. At a time like, she was still thinking of others, even though she should be wanting to scream out loud. When she should really be the most concerned...

Before he realized it, he had pulled her close to him, tightly wrapping his arms around her.

He’d wanted to do this for the longest time. But he couldn’t have...

Against his chest Yuuri tensed, startled. He held her like a delicate glass ornament, as though she’d crumble into dust the second he took his hands away. The emotions welled up inside him with her pulled so close.

He loved her.

He loved Yuuri.

He didn’t want to lose her.

He couldn’t believe that she was going to die.

He hugged her closer and closer, as tight as he could, as though unless he held her as close as possible he was afraid she would go somewhere far, far away.

“If it’s me... is that no good? If I’m the one who stays with you until the end... am I not good enough?” Before he realized it, he was murmuring his deeply hidden emotions into her ear.

At Takeru’s unplanned confession, Yuuri stiffened. But even though she was confused, she entrusted herself to Takeru’s embrace.

There was no other sound outside the two of them. Nestled close together, neither moved an inch. Inside the world that was only theirs, the night that was only theirs passed quietly.

*

At the same time, there was an uproar starting near the gate. Yamato, Akira, Makoto and Kiichi were throwing burning bottles, and had a single guard held hostage.

Through the piercing sound of a siren, Yamato yelled at the guards, "No violence! Listen to me - I want to talk to Shibasaki!"

"With Shibasaki?" a security guard responded.

"Call him. If you do, we'll let this guy go right away."

Just then, a man stepped from behind the guard. He had a wide forehead and thin cheeks, and looked cool-headed.

"I am the new head of the bureau for preventative measures, Morioka. Shibasaki has been dismissed. You are the person known as Yamato?"

Shibasaki... was gone? The new chief was this Morioka...?!

"I gather you've made light of us in the past, but now that I am in charge, don't think that will be tolerated anymore."

He made eye contact with the guard. "Shoot them."

Guards began to pour out of the gate. All of them held guns, and they began to fire without mercy. It was clear they intended to kill the four boys, who quickly ducked behind cover.

At that moment, the gunfire suddenly stopped. The guards stepped aside, and someone walked through gate.

It was Shibasaki!

He wore neither protective gear nor a mask, and was empty-handed. Morioka called to him.

"Shibasaki - what do you think you're doing!"

Shibasaki ignored the voice, and kept walking.

Finally speaking to the Shibasaki right in front of him, Yamato said, "Will you come with us? There's someone who wants to meet you."

"There is someone I also would like to meet," was Shibasaki's surprising reply.

"Who is it?" Yamato asked.

Shibasaki handed him a photograph. It showed a girl in a school uniform - it was unmistakably Yuuri!

"My daughter," Shibasaki said. Everyone gasped.

Yuuri... was Shibasaki's child?

*

"You're not cold?"

Mori placed a blanket at Shibasaki's feet. The man was waiting in the gym for Yuuri to wake up. Makoto and Akira sat nearby, watching with bitter eyes.

"Don't bother being nice to a guy like that!"

"That's right, he's the jerk who threw us away like garbage."

Kiichi chided them, "Hey, he's Yuuri's father."

Makoto burst out, "Which makes it all the worse, right?"

Shibasaki stood. He turned towards them. "It is just as you say. I must apologize to all of you. I'm sorry I broke my promise." He bowed his head low.

Yamato spoke hesitantly, "This is about Yuuri..." When Shibasaki turned to him, Yamato met his gaze steadily. "Maybe only a day left..."

Shibasaki's expression changed. She... only had a day to live?

At this, Suzuko also looked shocked. She hadn't known - all this time, she'd been thinking only of herself...

*

Morning came. When Takeru woke up, Shibasaki was sitting in front of him.

"What are you doing here...?" He asked, surprised. Yuuri was lying with her head in his lap.

Shibasaki looked at her breathing slowly, and murmured, "Even someone like me wants to be near their child..."

Takeru gaped at him. Child? Yuuri was Shibasaki's daughter?

At that moment Yuuri also opened her eyes.

Shibasaki stood up. "Yuri..."

But looking at him, Yuuri's eyes glittered with hatred. "Don't call me by name. I'm not your daughter Yuri anymore."

"I was told you wanted to see me."

"...I did - "

She stood unsteadily, and moved closer to Shibasaki.

"So that we could die together!"

Without thinking Takeru stepped between them. Yamato ran into the room.

"Stop it, Yuuri!"

"Let me go!"

Takeru and Yamato held back a struggling Yuuri, but Shibasaki stood unmoved.

"It's fine. I don't mind. I killed your mother."

Takeru and Yamato looked at each other, startled. Shibasaki began to tell the story haltingly.

The story of that day... the day that thing fell from the sky...

*

"I was the one who ordered the road between Tokyo and Makuhara barricaded. I didn't know the reason, but we couldn't let even one person out of Makuhara, or all of Japan - no, all of the world - would fall into a panic. Not only that - everyone would be in danger. That is what I was told, so I had the entrance blocked, and guards placed there. It wasn't my decision, but they were to shoot anyone who tried to escape.

But somehow, my wife and daughter had also gotten trapped in the city. I didn't learn this until it was too late. By the time I heard Yuri's voice calling to me, it was too late. I told the guards, "Don't shoot!" But my wife put her body between them and Yuri, and took a rain of bullets in the back.

No matter the reason, because of my order my wife is dead. I can never change that. The one who killed Yuri's mother... is me."

*

"Get out," Yuuri said to Shibasaki in a choked voice. "I won't forgive you - I can't. I don't even want to see your face."

"I understand," Shibasaki said, and walked out, his shoulders slumped with the loneliness of having been rejected by his only child.

Yamato followed him into the hallway, but stopped when Suzuko called him quietly.

"I want you to stay with Yuuri. That's the only thing that can still be done for her..."

*

Yamato entered the music room. Yuuri and Takeru were sitting silently on the sofa.

"I'll go look for something to eat," Takeru said, standing abruptly. Left alone in the room, Yuuri and Yamato were silent for a moment.

"Did Takeru tell you? To stay near me."

"That's not it. I'd be here even if no one told me to be... because you're my friend. The kind I'll never forget my entire life."

Yuuri gave a small smile. "A friend... I was thinking the same thing, about you."

But as she said those words, Yuuri's expression grew lonely.

"Isn't it enough, already? With Shibasaki." Yamato said. "Just forgive him. It's been as hard for him as it has been for you. We didn't call him here. He came on his own. Because he's your father. He came here because he wanted to see you again. If you leave it like this... it might be the end for him."

But as he spoke, Yuuri's eyes closed without him noticing. He looked over to see her slumped on the sofa as though dead.

Startled, he shook her. "Yuuri? Yuuri!"

At his yelling, her eyes fluttered open. "I'm fine. Don't shout like that," she said in a weak voice. "Can we just stay like this for a minute?"

As she spoke, her trembling hand gripped Yamato's. As though finally being relieved, she closed her eyes again.

*

Takeru stood in front of the closed door to the music room as though he couldn't decide whether or not to go in. His chest was filled with a turmoil of emotions. Finally steeling up his resolve, he opened the door.

Yamato and Yuuri were nestled close together on the sofa, her hand tightly held in his.

For an instant, Takeru's heart ached. But he had also come to an understanding. After quietly calling Yamato over, he gave him a clear declaration.

"I'm going to take care of Yuuri from now."

"Takeru, you...

"I love her. She's troubled now, but I want to do something to put her at ease. I want her to forget the bad stuff, and smile. Maybe you're thinking there's nothing to be done now, but go along with me, ok?"

Yuuri lay on the sofa, breathing peacefully. Looking over at her, Yamato gave a small nod.

*

Everyone had gathered in the gym.

Yuuri was in the middle of a circle. Takeru sat on the stage, singing the song Reiji had written before his death.

Yuuri was listening but her eyes watched a point in space. Yamato looked at her face, full of calm and dignity.

After Takeru, the other kids got up on stage to perform various routines and tricks. Before long the gym was filled with bright laughter. Even Makoto and Akira were smiling, even Suzuko, even Mori and Kiichi and Yamato and Takeru...

Even Yuuri was smiling.

But before they knew it, their time of fun had passed. The gym grew silent. Tears rolled down Suzuko's cheeks, and then Mori's, and even Makoto's and Akira's.

"What's with you guys?" Takeru said with exaggerated annoyance.

"Because - " Suzuko choked out.

"We don't want Yuuri to die," Mori said, shaking fiercely. Yuuri gave him a gentle smile.

"Thank you. That's enough. I'm happy that everyone did all this for me." As she said that, the smile disappeard from her face.

A heavy silence fell. Then, bang! Yamato jumped up and ran out of the room.

Watching him go, Yuuri muttered, "I'm sorry, but could I be alone now? Please..."

Looking at each other, they left the gym. The last to move was Takeru, but he finally pulled himself away.

When she was alone, Yuuri drew a knife from her pocket and stood silently.

One thought had never left her mind.

She had to revenge her mother's death.

*

Takeru was running around desperately. In the blink of an eye Yuuri had disappeared, and in her condition... He had no idea where she could be. If by some chance he couldn't find her before something happened...

Then he spotted a haggard figure collapsed next to one of the storage containers in the city center. As he helped her up, Yuuri muttered, "I couldn't forgive him after all. I can't give up until I kill him..."

*

That night. Yuuri had been brought back to the gym. But she couldn't even sit up on her own anymore. She lay sideways on the sofa, eyes closed.

Yamato had also returned. After he'd run out, he'd been searching for Shibasaki. He was Yuuri's only blood relative. She couldn't just die like this with that hatred still between them.

Shibasaki started to move towards her, but Takeru stepped between them. "Wait a minute. Please get out."

"Takeru," Yamato started to say, but Takeru interrupted him.

"Isn't this enough? Just let her forget the difficult things."

"It's all right to let it continue being painful? Aren't they family? Aren't they father and child? Letting her keep hating him like this... that's too painful."

Yuuri's eyes had opened. Glaring at Shibasaki, she raised her hand as though the knife was still clutched in it. It was no longer there, and she struggled in frustration against her body's weakness.

"Stop it. I don't want to see you like this," Yamato said with a sorrowful expression, and shook his head slightly.

"I won't forgive you. No matter what. I don't think of you as a father," she muttered painfully.

Suddenly, Shibasaki moved forward and embraced her. Everyone present was shocked, including Yuuri.

Hugging her, the organism would enter Shibasaki's body... but he didn't seem to care about that. He continued to hold his struggling daughter tighter and tighter.

"Yuri... I'm sorry. I've never done anything for you as a father. So... at least, we can die together. Forgive me."

Tears began to fall from Yuuri's eyes. "If that's how you feel, help everyone here. Save them. Because they're my dear friends. I've lived until today because they've been with me. Friends like that shouldn't be betrayed by my father. Please, dad."

Listening to her faltering words, the others began to cry. Yuuri's warm, gentle, kind words slowly entered each of their hearts. Finally, the last moment had come. They gathered close around her. She looked affectionately at each of their faces.

"Mori, thank you. It was fun always being with you."

Mori nodded several times, tears flowing down his cheeks.

"Makoto, Akira, we fought a lot, didn't we. but I think you turned out to be decent guys." The two shook their heads.

"Kiichi, I hope you get out of here soon." Kiichi was struggling fiercely against the tears.

"Suzuko, get along well with Yamato." Suzuko started crying harder at Yuuri's gentle words.

She spoke as though they were parting, but now there was a smile on her face. She looked towards Takeru.

"Takeru, if I'd actually been a boy, I think you would have been my best friend. Don't die in here." A tear fell from her eye, and one as well from his.

Last she turned to Yamato.

"Yamato, thank you for your courage. If you hadn't been here, if I hadn't seem your smile, I wouldn't have realized how good other people can be."

A smile spread on her face again. "I'm so thankful I was able to meet all of you."

And her eyes closed.

That was it.

*

That night, a quiet snow started to fall on Makuhara in the middle of the night.

"Look at this." It was just the two of them in the music room. Takeru pointed a finger at the desk. On top of it was carved, COURAGE. Yuuri's final message.

"I couldn't do anything for her in the end. If it hadn't been you, if you weren't the one she liked, maybe I could have been more of a support to her..." He couldn't get any more words out.

Yamato looked out the window. The snow was falling heavily. It covered everything, the dirty earth, and made it pure white. Yamato thought, that is what she left behind.

*

The next day, the children and Shibasaki dug a grave in the schoolyard. They covered it with the desk with COURAGE written on it.

Shibasaki said a prayer, then stood to face all of them. "Thank you for being with her, for being her friends. I don't have long either, but as she said, I want to help you. It would be a shame if I died without doing anything."

"Shibasaki," Yamato said, and the man looked at him. "There's just one thing I want to ask you. We're stronger than you think, so you can tell us. What is the government keeping hidden?"

For a second Shibasaki kept his mouth shut. Finally he drew a breath with resolve, and looking at everyone's face, he began to talk.

END OF CHAPTER EIGHT

(Phew, glad that one's over! Sorry it took so long but it was so sickeningly sappy that I kept putting it aside. Hopefully I'll be able to finish up the last two chapters with less delay.)

“Of course they ended up eating him.”

First of all, to those reading Our Courage, I’m really sorry it’s taking so long! I meant to have it finished by the end of December, but was busy what with travelling home for the holidays. But don’t worry, I’m still working on it and we only have two chapters + a handful of pages to go.

 

Second of all, today is my one-thousandth day in Japan! I encountered the same problem counting this as I did when I tried measuring my five-hundredth day – namely, I was out of the country on the precise day-since-I-came, and so had to pause the countdown and restart it when I reached Narita again.

 

Third of all, we had a “special” dish at school today, almost as if in honor of my special day. Going on three years here, it’s not as common as it was at first that I have my “eating something for the first time” moment, but today was one to remember.

Most of the tray was everyday – white rice, boxed milk, miso soup, pickled radish. And then there was the meat, which came in perfect cubes in a very dark sauce. It was delicious but unrecognizable. Maybe some part of a cow, but it was chewier. Horse, maybe? I always keep an eye out for the very red meat of raw horse – basashi – but I had no idea what it looked like cooked. Perhaps there was a little of the sour taste I associate with sea-creatures - sort of like eel, which is far too rubbery to be to my tastes, but I’ve grown used to it.

I didn’t ask what it was, not for several hours. I’ve learned how to deal with eating things I don’t recognize by not identifying them until they are well digested and past the point of danger. If my mind doesn’t object to something, it’s less likely my body will reject it.

That evening, after we practiced with the kids for their Interactive Forum next month, we started chatting with them randomly about what their favorite animal is. I guess it shows I’ve been here too long – when my mind goes from “cute animal” to “delicious animal” with no hesitation.

“Sensei,” I asked K-sensei, with whose homeroom class I’d eaten lunch that day. I’d noticed him diving for seconds of the meat dish along side his boy students so despite my trepidation, I knew it was something that others were . “What was that we ate today?”

He got the shifty look of one trying to figure out how to handle an unpredictable foreigner. “What do you think it was?”

His reticence right there told me it was not cow. “Some kind of fish?” I hazarded.

“Yes,” he said, and my heart floated with relief. Not horse, then. And I’ve gotten used to eating all kinds of fish. Except – and plummeted as he spoke again. “Very big fish.” Except two.

“The biggest?” I said weakly. He nodded. “Kujira?” I said even weaker. Whale. He nodded again, a gleam in his eye.

Another way you know you’ve been living in Japan too long – when your instinctive reaction to something would not be out of place in a children’s animated cartoon.

I literally clapped one hand over my mouth, the other over my eyes where tears sprang up unbidden. I spun in a circle and collapsed to my knees, peering with betrayed eyes over the edge of a desk while my students pointed and laughed. “Shokku! Shokku!”

A shock I soon recovered from and stood, ruefully wiping my glasses. No point crying over spilled whale.

“Foreigners are sure picky. You don’t eat natto, either, right?” Natto are the fermented soybeans I’ve spoken of before.

I have eaten natto before – once – in a very small portion consisting of a few beans and some slime, wrapped up in an omelet, which a determined teacher served me at a party one time. But I didn’t care to eat it in great quantities, I explained, because of the smell.

“Would you rather eat natto or kujira?” one clever student asked.

“In my mouth, kujira is delicious, but to my brain it is pitiful,” I explained in halting Japanese. “In my brain, natto is fine, but in my nose it is unpleasant.” And indeed, if it weren’t for that brain factor, I would probably be fine with eating both – but since natto’s unpalatable nature was so played up by Japanese and foreigners alike since I first got here, I’ve an automatic “can not eat” reaction to it.

Much the same as to the whale – now that I know what it looks like, I can’t imagine I’ll be able to bring myself to eat it again, even with the pressure of eating in the classroom where I’m supposed to provide a good example by eating everything on my plate. Then again, I don’t think I’ll be served whale anytime soon – K-sensei said that though when his father was a child it was often served as school lunch, it is much rarer now, perhaps only once a year. It is also very expensive, but this school district is comparatively well off.

As we left the classroom, I was asked, “but Emily, wasn’t it delicious?” as though that should be the only consideration.

Yes, I admitted. It was.

But that’s not.

Our Courage, Chapter Seven

In a corner of the marketplace, a banner had been hung with "Makuhara Area Temporary Government" spray-painted on it. Since they sucked at kanji, "temporary" was written in hiragana, but Makoto and Akira still looked at the banner with satisfaction.

About twenty young people sat on the ground, and Takeru spoke to them with a calm expression.

"Now the first meeting of the Makuhara Area Temporary Government will commence. To open, we will hear some words from our leader, Mr. Yamato."

"Cut it out. We don't need greetings or calling it something grandiose like the Temporary Government..." Yamato, who'd been forced to sit in front of everyone, raised his voice in dissatisfaction.

"It can't be helped. The greetings are part of the election process, and an important duty of the elected leader's."

Pulling a reluctant Yamato to his feet, Takeru quickly whispered into his ear, "So, as Leader, can you just say a few words? Just to stay on everyone's good side."

Yamato, with a sullen face, finally said only, "Let's begin," and immediately sat down. There was some scattered applause.

As chairman, Takeru began to speak with a smile. "All right, we'd like to hear the opinions from all of the group leaders who have gathered here."

Here, Yamato broke in. "Ho-hold on a sec. Why isn't Ryuu here? He's a group leader, isn't he?"

"It's fine, that guy doesn't need to come."

Makoto and Akira shook their heads. With a cough, Takeru redirected the proceedings.

"Well then. From now on, what should we do in order to improve the life in Makuhara? That is what we'd like to hear everyone's opinions about."

"Takeru." When Mori spoke up, Takeru wagged a finger at him.

"It's not Takeru now, call me Chairman. Also, when you want to speak, please raise your hand first."

"Let's get a basketball."

"Basketball? Are you kidding? We're in the middle of discussing how to improve everyone's life."

"So we can all play basketball together."

"The important thing here is the necessities of life, right?"

"Well, then a soccer - "

"I said 'necessities of life'."

But the others, who had been listening silently until then, began to chip in with their own opinions.

"That'd be good, basketball or soccer."

"Yeah, we just need some balls."

"Let's ask for it. Let's try!"

Even Makoto said, "Recreation is necessary, too."

"Well, I guess..." Takeru muttered reluctantly.

"Then it's decided."

As secretary, Akira wrote "soccer" on the blackboard without a moment's delay. Mori, of course, was grinning. Takeru alone had a sullen expression.

Akira had a new proposal. "If we're thinking about having a flag, should we make one?"

"What should we call ourselves?"

Akira's eyes began to sparkle at Makoto's question. "How about Team Makuhara?"

"That's real creative," Takeru interjected with a sour face.

"Then let's make it something like Makuhara Runaway City. With City written in English."

"That sounds awesome."

As everyone present got more and more excited, Takeru's face grew more sour.

"On the other hand, all of us are less than twenty, so how about calling it Less-Than City."

At Akira's suggestion, everyone looked at each other.

"That's good, Less-Than City." A murmur of agreement rose.

"Then it's decided." Akira wrote Less-Than City on the board. That was the instant that the village of deserted children was given a new name.


The meeting continued in this fashion despite Chairman Takeru's careful planning. After the idea of making a public bath had been decided on, Kiichi spoke up.

"Our goal ought to be self-sufficiency."

"Self-sufficiency?"

"Growing vegetables."

"Vegetables?"

"Just the deliveries aren't enough, right? Even if it's just potatoes or pumpkins, I think we should have something to fill up on."

"Do you know how many months that kind of thing would take?" Yamato asked.

Kiichi answered calmly, "If it's spinach, it would be about three weeks."

"Radishes would be about twenty days."

"Carrots are three months."

Their voices came one after another. Kiichi grinned broadly.

"Well, anyway, anything is better than doing nothing."

Thus was Less-than City's plan to become self-sufficient decided.

*

"Less-than City because we're all under twenty?"

"Is it a joke, or for real?"

That night in the gym, Kiichi, Yamato and Takeru discussed the day's meeting.

"It went well. The meeting was a success. It really is different with you as a leader, Yamato."

Yamato made an embarrassed face at Kiichi's words.

"But I didn't really say anything..."

"That's fine. That's what being Leader is about," Takeru said, strumming the guitar.

"Is that so..."

"That is so. All the prime minister, or the president, or other VIPs do is wave their hands and smile, right?"

"Is that so?"

"It is. Smile, smile! Go ahead, try it."

Yamato waved his hand and smiled awkwardly.

"You look like an unpopular idol," Takeru teased.

Yamato asked seriously, "But is smiling and raising your hand really enough?"

"It's okay, but that's not everything."

"Yeah?"

"Tomorrow you'll have to go tell Shibazaki what kind of things we need."

"Aren't I kind of being used?" Yamato asked with an exasperated expression.

*

The next day came, but Yamato wasn't able to ask for seeds after all. Now matter how desperately he asked, Shibazaki wouldn't approve their self-sufficiency. Disappointed, Yamato started to retreat to the meeting place.

"Didn't he just decide to run away?" Yuuri spat the words. "We just asked for seeds. If we make trouble over what we have to eat, then it's inconvenient for them. They don't want to listen to what we have to say about the delivery."

Though Yuuri never had anything good to say about Shibazaki, today she seemed to be especially hostile.

But that couldn't be helped, Yamato thought. Certainly today Shibazaki had been acting strange. It seemed like he was trying to hide something...

Yamato was at a loss, when Takeru came up with an idea.

"Hey, about the seeds, can't it work anyways? Not just seeds, but things like bulbs and potatoes. Why don't we all search for those?"

*

In a deserted residential district, Kiichi, Mori, Makoto and Akira went looking through house after house for seeds or bulbs. But everywhere was like a field after a swarm of locusts - there was not even a single grain of rice.

Just when everyone started to feel like giving up, Makoto came out of a nearby building.

"How was it?" Kiichi asked.

After a moment's hesitation, Makoto cautiously held out his hand. Resting on his palm was a single potato. As the other three looked at it, their eyes began to sparkle.

*

That night, everyone gathered around the crater. It was filled with the white flowers. Their large petals swayed in the night breeze, giving the area an eerie feeling like something out of a science-fiction movie.

"Is this all right? It's kind of creepy, here."

"We agreed, didn't we, that there isn't any other place with dirt," Kiichi said as he dug some holes. Into them Yuuri planted the potato which had been cut into four pieces.

"It has to be a secret. No saying anything to Shibazaki." Kiichi looked around at everyone.

Takeru shook his head. "But think about it, how long does a potato take to grow, anyway?"

"No idea..." None of them knew, though they had the feeling that they'd learned back in elementary school.


But the next day, they found a big surprise in their small garden. Somehow, there was already seedlings coming out - no, not just seedlings. There were thick, lush leaves, and when they tried turning up the soil, they found large potatoes had already grown.

*

"To start with, we tried baking them," Takeru said, holding a potato wrapped in aluminum foil. There was a savory smell, and they looked just the way baked potatoes should.

But they'd somehow grown up in a single night - no matter how you looked at it, that wasn't normal.

Somehow no one wanted to be the first to eat them, so they all demurred saying, "After you."

Since it couldn't be helped, Yamato spoke. "Alright, let's do it like this. I'll say 'ready, go' and everyone will take a bite at the same time. That way there will be no hard feelings."

Everyone nodded firmly.

"Okay. Ready, go!" Yamato closed his eyes and took a huge bite. "H-hot!"

But the flavor spreading through his mouth was without a doubt potato. And really delicious.

Opening his eyes, he saw everyone watching him with avid interest. Like an idiot, the only one to actually take a bite was Yamato.

"As expected of our Leader! So how is it?" Takeru asked, and Yamato grinned widely back at him.

"It's good! This is really delicious."

*

Before long, a great field had grown up around the crater. Yamato put up a sign that said, "Wanted: Seeds" and various kids handed over what they found, and plowed the dirt together, until a farm had been created.

Finally, here they'd achieved freedom from hunger. Kiichi, Mori, Makoto and Akira piled potatoes in a large box, with bright grins on their faces.

But those smiles froze in an instant. Ryuu, with his gang, stood before them with feet set apart.

"How long did it take you to do this?" he said, moving to take a box of harvested potatoes from Yamato.

"We're going to distribute these equally to everyone later. Can't you wait a little bit longer?"

"Aren't you sweet. Eat or be eaten, that's the only thing that matters here."

Ryuu laughed through his nose, and tried to take the box forcibly, but Mori stood in the way.

"No! These belong to everyone. We won't let you have them."

And as he spoke, several small boys and girls also stood before Ryuu holding a hoe and a shovel. Their faces showed a determination not to hand over the potatoes.

Ryuu was taken aback for a second. Then he spat on the ground, and left.

Watching all this, Yamato and Takeru's eyes met without thinking. Even the small children had recovered that much confidence and courage. It made both of them happier than anything.

*

At the same time, something was taking place near the gate. Someone had broken through the barriers, and successfully infiltrated Less-than City, before being halted by the final guards. Someone had invaded from the outside world.

It was Suzuko.

She'd been unable to forget that late night phone call. It had definitely been from Yamato. He was without a doubt still alive...

That belief was so strong that it had brought her all this way. When the road was blocked with checkpoints, she'd gone cross-country. She'd crossed a river and fields and climbed fences and hidden in a delivery truck until she'd finally arrived here.

She wanted to see him.

But while she was thinking only that, she'd missed the danger. She'd come this far, and now there was a line of guns all pointed at her. Now she was faced with a crisis.

Frozen with fear, Suzuko was unable to anything but stand there.

Then, having heard the fuss, Yamato came. Suzuko turned towards him.

"Yamato!" She called in a trembling voice, her emotions welling up. "You really are alive!"

She started to run to him, but he rebuffed her with a harsh voice.

"Don't come near me!"

Shocked, she stood still.

"Go home... Go home right away!"

"Why?" she asked. Her face tightened, unable to believe his words.

"Don't ask why! You shouldn't have come here. Get out. Hurry up and get out!"

"Yamato..."

"Just forget about me already."

"Why! Why would you say something like that?"

"I'll tell you... there's an organism inside us."

"Huh?"

"If you touch me, it will get into you. Then both of us will be dying."

"That's a lie."

"No, it's not," Yamato shook his head firmly.

Suzuko stood there until a guard pushed at her shoulder.

"Hey, you. Get out!"

Suzuko let herself be led towards the gate.

The sad look she sent over her shoulder met Yamato's.

The next instant, she'd torn free of the guard's hand, and raced back to Yamato. As though in slow motion, she flew into his arms.

"Wha-!"

Suzuko embraced him tightly. Tears came to both of their eyes.

"You idiot..." Yamato muttered. But in his eyes there was a nostalgic, happy look.

"I'm so glad... you're still alive," Suzuko murmured as she clung to him.

She had no regrets. Even if this organism slipped into her body, now that Yamato was here, now that she could be close to him, she was scared of nothing.

One more citizen had been added to the population of Less-Than City.

But this scene was being watched by Takeru, Mori, and Yuuri. All three of them wore complicated expressions.

*

Of course, it was good that Yamato was there... that's what Suzuko had thought as she jumped into his arms. But there were things about the daily life in Less-than City that she could never have imagined.

For starters, she was taken aback that there was no water. There was no change of clothes. There was nothing. And in a place like this, Yamato...

But that's what Suzuko didn't know. This Less-than city, from its former depths of violence and corruption and despair, was changing into a village of hope.

Everyone stood on the wharf beside the sea, passing sea water along a bucket brigade. They were preparing the public bath that had been discussed at the recent meeting.

"The boys' bath is full," said Takeru. "Next, the girls'."

Suzuko sat a little apart from where everyone was working. Mori, Akira, and Makoto sat around her. It seemed that they were listening to stories of the outside world.

"Huh? What? You didn't know that Amuro got married?" Suzuko said.

"Suzuko, is that true?" Makoto cried in a funny voice.

"It's the truth! It was a huge fuss all over Japan. They even printed extra newspapers about it."

"What a shock! I was a huge fan of hers!" Akira said, looking up at the sky.

Yuuri stalked over from where the others were working to the excited group around Suzuko.

"Oi!" she said, glaring at Suzuko. "What are you trying to do?"

"Huh?"

"Everyone's in the middle of working right now. Stop getting in the way."

"Oh, but everyone wanted to hear."

"So then it's fine if they don't get anything done?" Yuuri raised her voice. Yamato came over.

"That's enough. Suzuko didn't mean any harm. Give her a break."

Yuuri glared at both of them, then walked away sulkily.

Yamato looked at the taken-aback Suzuko with a troubled expression.

*

That night, he entered the tent where Suzuko was resting.

"Suzuko."

"Hmm?"

"You're not cold?"

"No, I'm fine. Thanks."

Yamato stammered as he spoke. "So... Could you not talk about the outside?"

"Huh?"

"Everyone here has been doing their best for a while, and finally working together. At a time like this, to hear about the outside, it's kind of..."

But she was fixedly returning his look.

"What, even you? The people in here doing know about the outside, the people outside don't know about in here. It's strange - we're all in the same Japan."

The people outside don't know about in here...

Yamato finally crawled into his bed next to Takeru. Suzuko's words wouldn't leave his head.

*

The next day, Yamato went to Ryuu's hideout. He carried a portion of the vegetables.

"This is rare..." Ryuu stood before him.

"I brought your portion," said Yamato.

"Hah, there's probably poison in it."

"Like I said, it's to be divided equally among everyone."

"Like I said, you're a hypocrite."

"It's not that, everyone's strength is necessary. Even you guys."

Ryuu looked at Yamato with angry eyes, but Yamato's gaze did not waver.

"Go back!" Ryuu yelled.

Yamato left the box of vegetables, and silently left that place.

*

The group of children stood stunned in front of the gate. It was morning, and a white fog surrounded them. But there was something different. Though they'd been waiting, the delivery had not come.

"It's been cut off. Why? Why isn't the delivery coming?"

Call though Yamato might, the gate remained firmly closed.

"You're kidding, right? This is a joke!"

As he pounded on the door, Yamato could hardly believe it.

Why would the deliveries stop suddenly? Had Shibazaki betrayed them? What on earth had happened?

In Yamato's heart, the dark shadow of suspicion had started to spread.

Was it possible that Shibazaki had really betrayed them? And Yamato had trusted him until the end like an idiot...

Thinking this, Yamato lost even the energy to keep pounding on the door.

His shoulders dropping, he avoided the suspicious eyes of the children watching and returned to the field.

Of course, Yamato couldn't know this. Shibazaki had resisted the national decision until the very last. So he had been removed from his position as Director of Countermeasures.

*

The news that the delivery had stopped spread over Less-than City in an instant. If there was no delivery... it was once more the world of thievery and violence.

Yamato stood stunned in front of the field. The scene before his eyes was one of merciless plunder. The children became a mob and grabbed everything they could.

Yamato suddenly noticed that Ryuu was standing on the other side, and gave a self-deprecating smile.

"You were right. I trusted Shibazaki like an idiot, and he betrayed us in the end."

Ryuu stared at him fixedly.

"If you want to laugh, then go ahead and laugh," Yamato muttered, and averted his gaze. Unable to do anything, his gaze fell on the field one more time.

*

They'd gathered once more where the election had taken place.

Here harsh criticism was being heaped upon Yamato.

"Oi, Yamato, why'd this happen?"

"Did you tell Shibazaki about the potatoes?"

Unable to take anymore, Yuuri came to his defense.

"Whatever happened, it can't be helped."

But the angry voices didn't stop at all.

"You're always talking on and on, why don't you do something?"

"You stepped out of line, that's what happened!"

Finally Takeru, Kiichi, and the other group leaders had a meeting between them. They were surrounded by the uproar on all sides.

"Stop it!" Yamato yelled, unable to contain himself.

Everyone froze in an instant.

"It certainly seems like the government has abandoned us. But... but we cannot abandon hope!"

Everyone returned to their seats. Watching them, Yamato's eyes were earnest.

"Haven't we put so much effort into coming this far? We could only rob and hurt each other, we've finally started working together to grow food and carry water. I don't want to see us give up like this. Even if the delivery has stopped, even if the government has thrown us away, we must not lose hope."

"But we're never going to get out of here," one boy called out. "What's there to be hopeful about?"

"I'll come up with something," Yamato said decisively. Suddenly Suzuko's words from the night before came to his mind. "That's right... the people outside don't know about us. That we're still living, that we need help, we need to let someone outside know."

Yamato's eyes began to sparkle. Everyone looking at that face thought it was one that could be relied upon.

*

That evening, Yamato and Takeru sat by a boat docked near the pier.

"We'll, you're reckless, you act without thinking, maybe it's courage. You're probably worn out - it's like you pitched three fast straight balls one after another. You're awesome!"

"I can't tell if you're praising me or making fun of me," Yamato grumbled, but Takeru just shook his head.

"Either way."

"Whatever."

"Don't force yourself - you don't have to act cool in front of me."

The setting sun lit up Yamato's face. His expression was hard, but his eyes looked into the distance, somehow lonely.

As though he could guess what was inside Yamato's heart, Takeru spoke in a gentle voice. "If I think about it, you're probably the one most shocked by Shibazaki's betrayal. Well, leave it to me. I'll take over from now on. We should wear out our winning picture, after all."

Yamato looked at him with a startled expression. Takeru just grinned the same bright smile as always.

*

Takeru put up a sign in the square, "Exchanging fresh vegetables for wireless, spare transceiver radios."

Yamato looked at it with a slightly scandalized expression, then at Takeru.

"This is your great idea?"

"Isn't it? We can let the outside world know about us with a radio. It's a great idea. You can just sit there and be quiet."

Yamato heaved a sigh, and just then a hand appeared in front of his eyes holding a transceiver radio. A tiny boy held it with a grin on his face.

"I'll trade this for some potatoes."

Soon after, they were fiddling with the radio in a field. Nothing but static came out.

"This is going to let the outside know? What good is this doing?" worried Yamato.

"This is really just a toy. We'll need another one."

Yamato rolled his eyes. "Then what is the point of this?"

Just then, over their heads they heard the voice of Ryuu's henchman Takako.

"Hey, morons."

Startled, they raised their faces and turned towards her. But today she wore a less mean expression. Pointing towards Ryuu's hideout, she jerked her head.

"C'mon. Ryuu wants to see you."

*

Yamato entered Ryuu's hideout to find himself in the middle of a group of children all holding various weapons. Takeru and the others followed him in.

"I'm going to say this first," Ryuu said without turning to face them. "I'm not going to be on your side... but you're such idiots that I can't just keep quiet."

He turned around. There was an amateur wireless radio in his hand.

"I already thought about communicating with the outside world with this. But there's a block on the radio waves in the area. No signal can get out of Makuhara."

"Then just that radio isn't enough?" Makoto asked.

Ryuu nodded, and continued, "But there's one frequency that isn't blocked."

"What's that?"

"The one the guards use. But it's not enough just to get your hands on one of their radios. They're specially encoded. If we're using the guards' radios, it will only be one way."

"So what if we built an antenna?"

Ryuu clucked his tongue at Takeru's question. "Idiot, as if it were that easy."

"Wait a minute," Kiichi's voice made everyone turn. "A boat. If we attached an antenna to a boat, and floated it out on the sea. How about that?"

"...That might just work," Ryuu said.

"But even if we make ontact, who will we make contact with?"

Yamato's eyes began to sparkle. "How would the radio be? If we can connect to a radio frequency, is that possible?"

Ryuu thought for a minute, and began to sketch a plan on the ground in chalk.

"Combining a guards' radio with the one I have, putting them on a boat, it should relay the signal even from inside Makuhara. Then it can broadcast from there to the nearest FM radio station."

Ryuu, looking almost happy, glanced at Yamato. Then, suddenly self-conscious, he dropped his eyes and muttered, "But in order for this to work we need to get hold of two guard's radios. One to send and one to receive."

*

The next morning. A group of children confronted the guards in front of the gate.

"Let us out of here!"

"Deliver our food!"

But this was actually only a diversion to lure the guards into the open. Without realizing this, they opened the gate and came out firing warning shots.

The children brandished rocks in return, well over a hundred children between Yamato's group and Ryuu's. All of them cooperating for this one battle.

"Ready, now!"

It was deafening in front of the gate. Bending their bodies low, Takeru and Yamato drew close to a stopped jeep. This was the first step. They successfully snagged two of the guards' transceiver radios.

*

Once they had those, they set up the "boat". It was actually an old tire with a small motor attached. Kiichi, Akira and Makoto had put some effort into making it. Then Ryuu attached his amateur radio.

Operation Makuhara Radio was complete. Without a word, the children nodded at each other, encouraged.
*

The sky was starting to show the colors of dawn. It looked like today would be good weather.

All of the children were gathered on the pier. A breeze blew the fog away, and the city could be seen on the other bank. All of their hopes and wishes joined as one, they waited for the boat to be set off.

Ryuu spoke. "This wireless will send Yamato's voice to the one on the boat, which will relay it to a radio station. Okay? Wait until the boat is halfway across the water before you go on air."

Yamato held his radio tightly. "Takeru, you give the signal," he called up to Takeru, who perched on a container looking over the ocean.

Kiichi cautiously lowered the boat onto the water. Everyone watched as he pulled the string on the small motor. Finally, the Operation was truly underway.

Holding their breath, the boat began to move. Every hope rode on it.

It took a long time, but they were so nervous that it seemed to flow quickly. If that boat should sink on the way, it would be a failure...

Takeru raised his hand in the signal. Already, the boat had reached the half-way point.

Yamato gripped his radio. A million emotions welled up in his chest.

"This is Makuhara City! This is Makuhara City! Everyone outside, can you hear me! It was a lie that Makuhara was destroyed in an earthquake. We are trapped in the city. Please save us! The government has blocked us in. They are concealing the truth from the media in Japan. Please realize that we still exist! Please be aware that we are imprisoned here. Can you hear my voice? Please help us break free of the government. This is Makuhara City. This is Makuhara City. Can you hear me!"

Yamato's desperately pleading message rode the signal, and indeed reached the outside world. Shibazaki riding in a car heard it clearly on the radio. His pleas overlapped a radio DJ's cheerful chatter.

"Please save us! We are struggling to survive. There is no food, water, or other essentials. But we will not be abandoned! Please let us free!"

Shibazaki's face turned white.

*

In the far distance, a shadow appeared in the sky lightening with dawn. It rapidly drew closer, and soon was circling overhead. It was a helicopter, the roar of its propellers deafening. On Shibazaki's orders, it had come to immediately pinpoint the source of the radio signal and destroy it.

"This is Makuhara City! This is Makuhara City! Can you hear me?"

On the pier, Yamato's voice sounded as though he were praying. And it was not only him - every single person living in Makuhara had the same prayer in their hearts.

Let someone hear our voice. Please, let someone be aware that we are desperately trying to live in this city.

The helicopter passed over - it seemed to have spotted the boat.

There was a rain of gunfire. Yamato continued calling out. "Please! If you can hear my voice make the government set us free! This is Makuhara City. Can you hear me? We are still alive!"

Abruptly the transmission cut off. In the far distance, the boat could be seen sinking. The bullets had hit the mark. It slowly disappeared into the depths of the ocean. The helicopter flew away.

"Do you think it reached them, our voice?"

"We have to believe that, if we want to have hope," Takeru said.

"We did everything we could do," Yuuri said.

That was true. They'd done what they could...

Yamato looked over the blue sea where bits of their boat still floated. Yuuri's words echoed in his mind.

*

Though the radio transmission hadn't been a complete success, Takeru felt more cheerful. For a little while, everyone in town had been connected by a strong bond. Perhaps they hadn't become one, but...

And it was perhaps partly thanks to Yamato, and his overdeveloped sense of justice. Thinking this, Takeru reached for his guitar, but realized his pocket was empty.

"Looking for this?"

Yuuri appeared standing before him, holding out his pick. She was smiling a soft smile he'd never seen before.

"Thanks," Takeru said, as he reached to take it from her.

For an instant their fingers brushed. Takeru's expression froze.

Yuuri exited without noticing, but Yamato, coming in just then, did. "What's wrong?"

Takeru stood stock-still. As though forcing his voice out, he said, "Yu-Yuuri's hand... was cold..."

END OF CHAPTER SEVEN.

Our Courage, Chapter Six

“Welcome! It’s fine to look at anything, looking is free.”
Makoto, Akira and Kiichi were hawking items in the marketplace. But Makoto was the only one with enthusiasm. The other two were entirely listless. Not to mention the three had been there since the morning but hadn’t sold a thing.
It was only to be expected - among the goods they’d laid out, there was a broken globe, a broken desk lamp, a half-filled sketchbook, and a guitar with only three strings... honestly speaking, it was all crap. None of it would sell.
While Makoto and the others were considering closing up their pretend shop, nearby Yamato and Takeru sat together under the bright orange blanket that had been delivered.
“Of course, as a Japanese person, I like rice best. Warm rice. Just imagine it. Pickled plums, salmon, kelp, dried fish... Yamato, what’s your favorite filling for rice balls?” Takeru asked, in a dreamy tone.
Yamato answered in the same, “Cod roe.”
“Cod roe? You want to taste that crunchiness, right?”
Yamato swallowed, and nodded.
“Why don’t you ask Shibazaki? He promised, right? If everyone was calm he’d listen to our requests,” Takeru said, suddenly down to earth. Yamato was alone in his dreaming about eating rice balls.
“Yamato!” Mori ran up with a strange expression. He pulled an open-mouthed Yamato towards the gate. There, Ryuu with a group looked up at the watching guards. The children held torches, and every face was fierce.
“The general promised to listen to us, didn’t he?” Ryuu yelled.
“What are you talking about?”
“We want real food. Every day we get nothing but cans, give us something decent to eat!”
Not looking at Ryuu, the guard addressed Yamato who’d just come up. “What are you doing? Don’t let them do whatever they want!”
Ryuu looked at Yamato with a scornful smile.
“Hey, since when are you the boss of us?”
“Don’t make a fuss,” Yamato told him.
“You’re giving me orders? We’re not your followers.”
“Hey, this isn’t a question of leaders or followers. Yamato’s just the point of contact, so to speak. If everyone’s talking about various things, they won’t listen to any of us.”
When Takeru answered for Yamato, Ryuu’s oldest friend Reiji said, “You, shut up.” He twisted  Takeru’s arm.
“Owowowow!” Takeru grimaced.
In the middle of the uneasy atmosphere, Yamato said to Ryuu, “If there’s something you want, I’ll ask for it.”
Scowling at him, Ryuu spit on the ground.
*
That night.
In the music room, Takeru, Kiichi and Mori had gathered.
When Takeru mentioned the coldness of Reji’s hand when he grabbed his arm, everyone’s faces grew dark.
“His hand was really cold?” Kiichi asked.
“Yeah, I only felt it for a second, but it was freezing.”
When Takeru nodded, Mori and Kiichi exchanged glances. “That’s the sign.
“Huh?”
“When a person is going to die in a couple of days, their hands get cold.”
“Before he died, my dad said his hands felt cold.” At Kiichi’s words, Mori shook his head, frightened.
“He’s already twenty, that Reiji guy...”
As they fell silent, they all felt a sudden chill. But of course, that was only because of the temperature of the room...
*
The moon had come out.
Shibazaki spoke to Yamato from behind a metal grate.
“How is it, inside?” The guards with guns stood behind him.
“It’s pretty much changed.”
“That’s good.”
“It’s just...”
“Yes?”
“It seems like the food isn’t quite enough, everyone’s saying... well...”
“What?”
“If it’s impossible, just tell me.”
“What is it?”
“...rice balls,” Yamato said in a low voice.
“What was that?”
This time Yamato said it clearly. “We’d like to eat rice balls.”
“Rice balls?”
“I’m sorry.”
Yamato bowed his head apologetically, but Shibazaki answered, “I’ll see what I can do.”
His face brightening, Yamato bowed again, deeply.
*
The next day, a changed atmosphere surrounded the delivery. Rice balls had been added to the usual supplies. It was like a dream - pure white rice wrapped in crisp seaweed. Genuine rice balls.
Everyone lingered over eating them, slowly and regretfully taking the last bite. They understand that, more than anything, they were taking bites of happiness.
Yamato felt extremely grateful to Shibazaki, eating his dreamed-of rice ball. An idea suddenly popped into his head.
That’s it!
In a short while, a piece of paper appeared in the marketplace:
“Collecting Requests.
Since the delivery only comes once a day, we should ask General Shibazaki for things we really need. Write down your requests, and bring it to the gym.
Yamato”
*
“Welcome!”
Makoto raised his voice cheerfully. Sitting next to him, Takeru also looked up. There was finally a customer standing in front of their shop. But as Makoto saw who it was, a cloud crossed his face. It was Ryuu’s buddy, Reiji.
“What do you want?” Akira asked suspiciously, but Makoto spoke in a friendly voice.
“Hey now, he’s a customer. What can we get you?”
Reiji’s blank eyes rested on the guitar.
“Well, as expect, the customer has excellent taste. This is a good choice, this guitar. It’s a Guild, do you know of it?”
“It’s my guitar,” muttered Reiji. “Where’d you get it?”
“We found it in an empty lot,” Akira answered quickly. Reiji took the guitar by the neck, and Makoto tried to stop him in a panic.
“Wait! Finders, keepers, right? Give it back. If you want it, give us something.”
At Makoto’s threatening attitude, Reiji turned with surprising calmness and left that place. With his hands in his pockets, his hunched figure looked lonely as he walked away. Takeru, watching him go, remembered his cold touch from the day before.
*
Takeru found Reiji shortly afterward staying in an abandoned building. He was holding that guitar.
“What,” Reiji asked bluntly. He’d been reading a book, and Takeru couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen someone doing that.
“I was thinking I wanted to apologize about earlier. Sorry, we really didn’t know it was your guitar.”
“It’s fine.”
“I brought it back.” Saying this, Takeru put the guitar next to Reiji.
“But can you actually play it? There’s no strings.”
Without answering, Reiji silently picked it up.
*
They sat next to each other. Reiji was trying to tune the three-stringed guitar. He seemed happy to have it in his hands after a long time, and he and Takeru were having their first real conversation about various topics.
It seemed he’d wanted to be a musician. He hadn't passed any auditions. He’d been thinking if he got out of here, he’d like to write some good songs, get into the indies scene.
When he’d finished talking, Reiji muttered, “I’ve got to get out of here, quick.”
For a second, Takeru felt that chill again. Looking over at the other boy’s profile, he gave a small nod.
*
There was an incredible crowd in the gym. Everyone had come because they’d seen the paper and wanted to add something to the requests box.
“This is a huge turnout,” said Kiichi, his eyes wide.
“If we charged a can of food from each one, we’d make a killing,” Makoto whispered to Yamato.
“Don’t be an idiot.”
“Hey, can I ask for a ‘Dreams Come True’ CD?”
“I want some mousse, and chap-stick.”
Yamato rolled his eyes at Makoto and Akira’s chattering.
“What are you going to do, asking for things like that?”
“But I think everyone will ask for what they personally want.”
At Kiichi’s words, Yamato responded plainly, “Useless requests will be dismissed. We’ll present Shibazaki with the items that the most number of people want.”
“Well, aren’t you almighty, just because you got your rice balls.”
Yamato looked at the line, not even halfway done with their requests. The children slid pieces of paper into a box one after the other. Their eyes were shining, as though they’d been given hope.
“Wouldn’t it be a good thing if all of us could have just a little more comfort in our lives?”
*
The busy day ended. Yamato and the others sorted through the request box, checking off items.
“Roller blades.”
“Can we ask for something like that?”
“Nail clippers.”
“No good. We’ve got scissors.”
“Adult videos.”
“Don’t screw around.”
“A lot of people want miso soup.”
“Miso soup?”
Just then, Yamato noticed Yuuri nearby.
“Yuuri, help us out. We’re going to be doing this until tomorrow morning,” Kiichi called, but she just smiled bitterly at him.
“It’s because you’re trying to listen to everyone’s opinion. Didn’t you know what you were getting into?”
Yamato’s hand stilled as he looked at her. She’d changed her trademark white bandana for a brown one. She seemed a little more gentle lately. Her words didn’t have the same sharp sting as before.
Thinking of that, Yamato smiled brightly. "That's democracy.
“And you’re acting like a politician,” said a voice suddenly from the entryway. It was Ryuu. He had a gang behind him, and they glared at Yamato.
“You’re not being impartial.”
“What do you mean?” Yamato asked, puzzled.
“Whatever they give us, you’re going to keep for yourself.”
“We wouldn’t do something dirty like that!”
“So you say, but like a politician you’re in the position to control it all.”
Yamato was starting to return their angry looks. “I’m not thinking about politics here. I’m considering what’s best for everyone...”
“So how about you hand over all those papers to us? Then we’d be equal.”
As soon as Ryuu had spoken, Kiichi stood up, his face bright red. “Then why don’t you do this?”
Ryuu knocked over the box, glaring at Kiichi. Yamato jumped between the two of them.
“Don’t fight! I promised Shibazaki that we wouldn’t quarrel.”
“Aren’t you a good boy,” Ryuu spat.
As the gang was leaving, Takeru came in.
“”What happened?”
“Nothing,” Yamato said, shaking his head.
Akira confirmed it. “We should leave those guys out of it.”
“Well, let’s finish this up quickly.”
“Takeru, you help,” Kiichi urged him, but Takeru watched them work as though there was something he wanted to say.
“What?” When Yamato looked over at him, Takeru spoke with a rare diffidence.
“Could you ask Shibazaki for something?”
“What is it?”
For a second, Takeru’s eyes were lowered. Then he lifted his head, and opened his mouth decisively.
“Guitar strings.”

*

That night, heating up their bath in the courtyard, Yamato and Takeru continued their conversation.
“He doesn’t know yet, that he’s going to die soon. He’s writing a song on his guitar, and I want him to be able to play it before... that’s why I asked.”
At Takeru’s words, Yamato sat thinking for a moment, before raising his head.
“I can’t ask for that. Don’t get me wrong - “
“Why not?”
“I understand your feelings, but I have to put some limits on listening to everyone’s requests. If I relay every single one, Shibazaki isn’t going to have confidence in me anymore.”
“Confidence?”
“Plus, even if he plays his guitar it won’t save his life.”
“I know that, but - “ Takeru stammered, not understanding.
“I know it sounds cruel, but I’m doing this for everyone. Please understand.”
And saying this, Yamato left quickly, Takeru watching his back as he fled.
… Of course I understand Takeru’s feelings. We’ve been together this whole time, even sleeping together. And yet... Yamato told himself, If he were in my position, would he think the same way? If it were possible, I’d like to give Reiji a real opportunity to perform once before he died. That’s why Takeru wants the strings. He’s painfully pure-hearted like that. I understand that, but everyone who gathered in the gym today is the same. Everyone wrote down their requests with the same genuine hope. If I fail to be impartial... I can’t favor Takeru above everyone else.
“Yamato. Do your best!”
He was walking through the streets lost in his own dark thoughts, when a sudden voice pulled him back. It was a tiny girl. She didn’t have a place to live, so she’d found a corner of the square where a plank blocked the night wind. Returning her warm smile, Yamato raised his head.
He saw Reiji’s figure. He struck a lonely figure, walking with his guitar in one hand.
Yamato stood still, filled with unbearable thoughts. Mori came up, catching his breath. He carried a strange flower.
“You’ve never seen this kind of flower before, right?”
“What is it?”
“I don’t know for sure, but it was growing where the meteor crashed.”
“Huh?”
*
“In the crater?”
Shibazaki looked stunned when Yamato showed him the flower. Just as Mori had said, they were blooming all around the meteor site. Yamato had picked one witth large white petals, and brought it to the negotiating seat.
“Yes, I thought it might give us a hint about the microbe.”
“I’ll have it studied.”
Yamato handed the flower.
A guard interjected. “Is that all you came to say?”
Taken aback by his harsh tone, Yamato stammered, “Ye-es?”
“Didn’t you come to make more demands?”
“...If it’s possible, we’d like some miso soup. That, and - “
For a second, the guitar came to Yamato’s mind, and Reiji’s lonely figure, but it disappeared.
“And?” Shibazaki asked.
“Nothing.”
The guard grew angry at his indecision.
“Don’t get carried away! You think you can just make a sweet face. You get one thing and right away you ask for a second, you get that and you want a third. You take it for granted. Well, don’t be thinking you’ll get a third.”
“That’s not true! I’m doing my best, and there are even more things that people are asking for.”
As Yamato’s voice rose, the guard pointed his gun at him. But Shibazaki pushed it down.
“I understand. I trust in your judgement as leader.”
Yamato couldn’t bring himself to deceive the man. He had to keep trying to be impartial... Yamato bit his lip, and nodded.
I can’t say it. I can’t ask for something like guitar strings.
*
Shibazaki watched Yamato leave, his head hanging. He remembered the meeting he’d had that morning.
A staff member had revealed the investigation results so far.
“We are calling the microbe that arrived on the meteor type T-Makuhara. It transfers by skin-to-skin contact. It only affects humans. Symptoms may vary, but around the age of twenty there is degradation of cells followed by death.”
After the meeting, Shibazaki had been grilled by his superior. Why he’d had extra food sent inside, whether their first priority was the lives of the children or the containment of T-Makuhara.
Their first priority... wasn’t the lives of the children....
Shibazaki closed his eyes, and for a moment he stood there silently as though there was something he was trying to resist.
*
“I wonder what it feels like,” Kiichi muttered that night in the gym, unable to sleep.
“What?” Takeru asked, in the same mood.
“When you understand that you’re going to die soon... If possible, I’d like to die without realizing. It’s the counting down that’s hardest to bear.”
“...Yeah.” Takeru remembered the figure Reiji struck desperately trying to play a song with only three strings. Swamped with unbearable emotions, he pulled his blanket over his head. An unspoken misery had been building up in the depths of his heart since Yamato had refused him.
*
The guitar fell with a clatter, and Reiji opened his eyes.
In the bright morning sunlight, Ryuu and his gang were picking through his things.
Ryuu laughed coldly at Reiji’s puzzled face.
“Hey, you’re still alive.”
“Huh?”
“We came to get your stuff. Since you won’t need it anymore.”
“Of course I’m still alive, what are you talking about?”
“You don’t know?”
Everyone exchanged strange glances.
“You’re going to die soon. When your hands got cold, that’s the sign.”
Reiji’s expression changed. “That’s a lie. You’re lying, right? I’m not dying!”
Reiji leapt at him, but Ryuu shoved him away, and snorted.
“Whether it’s a lie or the truth, you’ll understand soon enough.”

*

“What happened? Why isn’t there any food?” Yamato called up to a guard.
The helicopter hadn’t come for some reason, and they wouldn’t explain anything.
“Say something! Answer me! Where’s Shibazaki? Tell him to come out!”
No matter how much Yamato yelled, the guards kept silent with their backs turned.
Before Yamato could learn the reason, Ryuu came up surrounded by his gang. In a loud voice, he called, “it’s annoying, you always suiting yourself. Because of you, we’ve got no food. I heard a rumor that you’ve been meeting with the other side in secret, and they let you eat to your heart’s content. That true?”
“Shut up! Yamato wouldn’t do something like that!” Mori jumped to his defense. But his voice fell on unheeding ears. Everyone gathered around Ryuu glared at Yamato with cold eyes.
“We’re not going to let you do whatever you want anymore. You’ve been talking about equality and a democracy, right? So let’s let everyone decide. You or me, who should be the leader. We’ll let them vote, how’s that? If you refuse, you’re just a dictator.”
“Fine,” Yamato said.
As soon as Yamato agreed to an election, Ryuu’s gang left with no fuss.
“Is that really okay? If Ryuu becomes leader, he’s going to keep the food and everything else for himself.”
“I’ll take care of it, if it comes to that,” Yamato answered Mori with little energy. More than Ryuu, right now his main worry was why the delivery had stopped.
*
At the same time, Shibazaki was meeting with the vice-minister of the committee.
“Why have you stopped the food delivery?”
“It was an executive decision,” said the vice-minister in a cold, haughty tone.
“Why was this decided so suddenly? Nothing was mentioned at yesterday’s meeting...”
“If the children show alarm, emergency measures will be taken. However, we must not let the disease leak to the outside. That’s an order.”
He started to walk away as he said this, but Shibazaki followed.
“Please wait a minute. Why was this decided so suddenly? Please explain the reason to me.”
“You don’t need an explanation!” His eyes glinted with a cold light. Shibazaki persisted.
“Is it the flower? Is there something secret about that flower? Is that what it is? Answer me! Vice-minister, I am the General of the committee! I am in charge here!”
The vice-minister looked at him, and opened his mouth. “This was a decision made by the state.”
That final ultimatum, Shibazaki understood better than anyone else.
*
As Yamato and Mori ran up to the square, they saw that Reiji was throwing a fit.
“I don’t get it! Why am I going to get killed by something like a microbe? I refuse, I won’t stand for it!”
“Calm down,” Takeru coaxed him. “Reiji! Calm down!”
But Reiji wouldn’t. Yamato came up to them. “Be quiet! Think about the others.”
The children surrounding them all were watching Reiji with the same frightened eyes.
“You can’t possibly understand what I’m feeling!” Reiji ranted.
Though he’d been calm, Yamato finally burst out, “Of course I do! You’re not the only who’s scared of dying here. Everyone is scared, but they’re keeping quiet about it! Don’t act like a spoiled child, it’s pathetic!”
“That’s enough, Yamato, stop it.” Takeru broke in.
“Ahhh!” Raising his voice in a wild yell, Reiji broke free of Takeru’s hand and fled.
Takeru watched him go, then turned to glare straight at Yamato. “You’ve really changed. Try thinking about his feelings before you say things like that. Have you forgotten how to be gentle? The Yamato who came here because he was worried about Kiichi, where’s he gotten to?”
Once he’d thrown these words at Yamato, Takeru took off after Reiji. Left behind, Yamato stood struck dumb in the square.
*
Reiji had climbed on top of a warehouse. He was up so high his eyes swam when he looked at the ground, and he drew in a deep breath.
“What are you planning to do now that you’re up there?” Takeru called up to him.
“Should I just wait calmly to die? It’s better if I just jump.”
“What about your guitar?” Takeru yelled as a last ditch attempt. Reiji froze. “Are you through with music? You’ve given up on your new song?”
“What about it? What can I do about it now?” Reiji muttered, his head hanging.
“How about you teach me? Teach me to play the song you wrote. Even if you can’t play anymore, I’ll be able to convey it. I’ll show everyone the song you made, in whatever time you have left. Will you let me do that?” Takeru asked as though his life depended on it.
Tears fell from Reiji’s lowered face. “Damn it... I don’t want to die!”
Reiji burst into long-repressed sobs. Looking up at him, Takeru’s chest tightened painfully.
*
Yamato returned to the gym in no better a mood. He saw Kiichi and the others had divded up the work of making something.
“What’s all this?” he asked, and Kiichi answered.
“You can’t tell by looking? It’s your campaign posters.”
“It’s fine. You don’t need to make something like that.”
“What do you mean? To start with, we have to make it clear that it wasn’t your fault the food delivery stopped.”
“Plus, Ryuu’s gang is doing dirty tricks like threatening and buying votes.”
As Makoto spoke, Takeru entered with a loud noise.
“Yamato. I really need those strings after all. Please.” He looked straight at Yamato as he spoke. There was an impatient light in his eyes.
“That’s...” Yamato started hesitantly, but couldn’t bring himself to say yes or no.
“I’m begging you.”
“...There’s no delivery now, and I can’t meet with Shibazaki anyway.”
“Anything you can do, and quickly.”
“Stop asking so much.
“Stop talking about how much trouble it is and do something!” Takeru yelled suddenly. He was angrier than any of them had seen him before.
“This is the last thing I’ll ask you for,” Takeru pressed Yamato without meeting his eyes.
“You can ask all you want, but there’s nothing I can do.”
“But you’ve got time to make things like this?”
“What?” Yamato returned Takeru’s sharp look for the first time. For a moment, there seemed to be violent sparks showering from where their eyes met.
“What’s the thing you want most? Before you ask anyone else, think about it for yourself. Rice balls are fine, miso soup is good, but the number one thing you want? Isn’t it to have some proof that you’re still alive?”
Takeru, it seemed, had struck onto the secret that had been hidden until now in Yamato’s breast.
“We aren’t dead yet. We’re still alive in here, and we want real evidence that that is true. Even if we’re going to die in here, we want to believe that we’ll be able to return to normal life someday, we desperately want someone to know that we were alive . That is the number one thing that could make us happy!”
Takeru yelled this, and his shoulders rose with a great sigh. He shot Yamato another glance.
“I want to leave something behind. So does he. He wants proof that he was alive, and that’s going to be his song.”
The gym once more fell silent. Kiichi and Makoto and Akira didn’t even move a muscle. Takeru’s words alone could move, and were entering into their hearts.
How long was it that they felt that? Finally, Yamato spoke.
“You don’t understand. You’re not thinking about anyone but that Reiji guy. What would you do in my position? You’d choice the guitar strings over anything?”
“...I understand. I won’t ask you anymore. Maybe you’re the leader, but you won’t get my support! You might be trying hard for the group, but for a single human being you’re useless,” Takeru barked, and Yamato suddenly grabbed him by the shirt.
“Don’t act so superior! There are three hundred people here, and I have to look out for all of them.”
Takeru shoved him away. “Which one of is acting important here? You don’t remember asking to be responsible for everyone’s requests? Meanwhile you’re overlooking one person who is near death!”
“Stop it! Can’t the two of you do anything but fight?” Mori yelled. But the two continued glaring at each other, and didn’t move.
Finally, Takeru shook off Yamato’s hand and the sound of his footsteps pounded out of the gym.

*

Takeru sat in the music room alone, his emotions still running high.
...That total idiot Yamato... Why couldn’t he understand?
As he calmed down, he noticed Yuuri standing in front of him.
“What?” He looked up at her with an unusually sharp gaze.
“You had a fight with Yamato?”
“You think there’s something funny about that?”
“I’m not laughing.”
Takeru looked down at the floor. “Look, sorry, but I don’t really feel like talking.”
“You should forgive him. Yamato is the type who really thinks about what he wants to do. You don’t get it? He hasn’t changed a bit. He’s still the straight-forward, stupidly kind guy.”
“You really look up to him, huh.” Raising his head, Takeru gave her a meaningful look.
“Not really,” Yuuri said, looking away. Takeru stood up.
“Well, it can’t be helped. Since you’re girl.”
Yuuri’s eyes grew wide. “What are you talking about?”
In an instant, Takeru had pulled the bandana of her head, and her long hair fell down around her face.
“You don’t need to hide it anymore. I get that before we got here everyone was on edge and it was a world where you do what you gotta do. I understand why you pretended to be a boy because you didn’t want to be thought of and treated like a girl. But it’s enough already. If you keep referring to yourself as a boy, then Yamato’s not going to understand how you feel.”
Yuuri glared as Yamato wound up his long-winded speech. “What are you on about?”
“Don’t act stupid. Say it already. You like him. Yamato.”
Yuuri answered, “Stop kidding around. Talking about liking other people, don’t be ridiculous.” But her tone was uneasy. She turned to go, her spine held straight. Takeru grabbed her arm.
“Whose the one kidding here?”
“What are you doing? Let go of me! It hurts, let go.”
Yuuri struggled, but Takeru’s hand wouldn’t let go, and he pushed her back to the wall.
“Stop hiding it, you like Yamato.”
Yuuri held herself still. Takeru’s eyes were seriousness itself.
“What’s with you, Takeru?”
“We don’t have time! So you have to say it. If you like him, then say it honestly!”
Yuuri’s eyes dropped. As though he couldn’t stand seeing her like that, Takeru continued yelling.
“Say it already! Say it!”
Finally, Yuuri raised her head. She met Takeru’s eyes straight on, and spoke clearly. “I like him.”
His hand that had been holding her arm lost strength. He nodded as he turned away, unable to look at her face. “I’m sorry.”
Without another word, he left the room.
*
The next day, trucks carrying food came one after another, entering the gate into Makuhara. They were making deliveries as ordered by Shibazaki.
The children ran up to the trucks. When the doors finally opened, pots of miso soup were carried out.
Shibazaki had remembered Yamato’s request. Everyone’s eyes glittered as they looked at the steaming soup.
“Sorry the food is late,” Shibazaki said to Yamato as he came up to the gate.
“It’s fine. But did something happen?”
“Nothing. There was a small blunder. It won’t happen again. Anyway, I hear you’re having an election?”
As Shibazaki examined his face, Yamato’s eyes widened. “How did you hear about that?”
“The guards informed me. You’re doing your best for everyone, but they don’t have faith in you. It’s my responsibility, and I apologize.”
Shibazaki lowered his head, and Yamato shook his. “That’s not it.”
“Let’s give everyone something to be happy about. To show my remorse. Think about something you’d like. Decide before tonight, then come back here.”
Thus cheerfully speaking, Shibazaki left. Yamato was left alone to think.
Something that would make everyone happy? What on earth was he supposed to do?
*
At the same time, Takeru was eagerly practicing guitar with Reiji. But Reiji no longer had the energy to play. On the guitar’s only strings, Takeru plucked just where Reiji told him to.
After he’d finished and was walking home, Takeru ran into Yamato.
Though he would have pretended not to notice and passed by, Yamato stopped him.
“Shibazaki wants to give something that will make everyone happy, in return for the food being late. He said to think about what we want.”
Though he was listening, Takeru played dumb. “So what? I don’t get what you’re trying to say.”
“I think you do.”
“It’s weird, you being inconsistent.”
“Isn’t it good?”
Unable to meet Yamato’s entreating gaze, Takeru looked at the sky.
“You ought to keep everyone’s opinion in mind, as the leader. If I were in your position, I would probably be doing the same.”
And with that Takeru left, Yamato watching him go lost in his own complicated thoughts.
*
That night, a large crowd gathered near the gate.
Something special was coming from outside! The rumor had spread quickly. Anticipation welled in everyone’s chest, as before their eyes Yamato finally returned from the other side of the gate.
Makoto, Akira, and Kiichi went to meet him happily. With this, they could win the election.
But opposite them, Ryuu and his gang stood dissatisfied, and as Yamato appeared they greeted him with jeers. “You dirty jerk! You went begging for something to make people happy, in order to get more votes.”
Abruptly, Yamato knelt on the ground. “I’m sorry. Negotiations failed. I couldn’t get anything...”
Makoto, Akira, and Kiichi were shocked. Yuuri also watched painfully as Yamato planted his hands on the ground.
“Forgive me... I talked big but I’m unable to be everyone’s leader. I don’t have the right qualities...”
“You seriously didn’t get anything?” Makoto shook his head as though he couldn’t believe it.
“Sorry.” Yamato kept his head lowered without saying anything else.
Kiichi said in a firm voice, “Stand up. You don’t need to apologize. Stand up, Yamato!”
But just then Ryuu started to attack Yamato. “What the hell did you do? They stopped the food, and we still don’t get anything in return? Is everyone okay with that, having a leader like this guy?” With loathing, Ryuu pushed Yamato’s head down to the ground.
“Just kneeling isn’t enough. I want you to go even lower!”
Makoto shoved Ryuu away. Ryuu glared at him. It seemed a fight was about to start at any minute, but Yuuri stepped between them.
“And if you were the leader, that’d be better? You want everyone to follow your example?”
She spoke flatly, glaring at Ryuu. Then she turned to the still kneeling Yamato.
“Stand up, Yamato. For everyone’s sake, stand up!”
As though prompted by that voice, Yamato slowly stood up. Then, without making eye contact with anyone, he walked silently away from the gate.
No one moved as they watched him walk away.
*
Takeru’s fingertips had started bleeding from pressing the frets. Reiji, just watching him, seemed to be wasting away. Playing the guitar with desperate thoughts, but nothing could be done about the guitar’s three strings.
Just then, Yamato appeared before them. There was a pack of new strings in his hand. Shibazaki had granted their request.
First Takeru, then Reiji’s expression changed. With eyes that seemed to have lost their light, Reiji looked at Yamato. In a hoarse but firm tone, he said, “Thank you. I won’t forget all of you.”
Finally, the clear sound of the guitar echoed through Reiji’s room.
Takeru played it with the new strings, playing the song Reiji had written.
Reiji listened to it with a calm smile on his face. Around them, Mori, Akira, Makoto, Kiichi, Yamato and Yuuri sat, listening with serious expressions.
“We all keep searching for something,
In this town where everything was taken from us,
We can do nothing. Will we become adults?
Our knees trembling, they look down on us,
The cold-eyed adults who are shown
Our final courage.
So we’ll discover, in this windless town,
When tomorrow finally comes,
The sun will rise again.”
Takeru continued playing, thinking of nothing but the song. The words pierced their hearts, the melody pierced their hearts. Even when he had stopped singing, no one said a word.
Reiji’s eyes had closed, and he didn’t move. His expression was one of deep calm. This moment was the testimony of his life, here was where he’d found it - that’s what his expression said.
He was dead.
Desperately resisting the tears welling in his eyes, Takeru whispered to Reiji, “I’m not going to die, Reiji. I’m definitely not going to die, because we are all going to live for you.”
*
The next day, when Yamato entered the gym, everyone was sitting in deep thought. They were pale with hopes and fears. What were the election results? Had Yamato won, or Ryuu?
The sound of Yuuri and Mori’s running feet came. “The results are up,” Yuuri said with no expression. “Unfortunately, it’s what everyone expected.”
Then he’d lost... With heavy feet, Yamato headed to the square. But the results pasted up there - by an overwhelming majority, it was Yamato’s victory!
… that Yuuri!

 

END OF CHAPTER SIX

State of the Novel address

So translating the novel was, as some of you know, my project for National Novel Writing Month, the challenge of which is to write 50,000 words of a novel in the month of November but which I reinterpreted as a translation, rather.

Reader, I reached 50,219 on November 29th.

I feel quite accomplished about that. But don’t worry, I’m not going to stop translating just because the primary goal has been achieved. We’re halfway to the end! Will they ever make it out of Makuhara?

I have been posting every day to keep up with the NaNoWriMo pace of a frenetic 1667 words per day. Now, however, I plan on doing a larger chunk just once a week, probably on Saturday or Sunday. So New Readers, I hope you will keep an eye out for that. And Old Readers, who fled at the deluge of novel posts, come back! I miss you! I’ll be posting regular posts on the other days of the week.

 

To catch up recent news: taking the Japanese Language Proficiency Test this Sunday. This show will be filming at my school, using thirty of my students as extras, which I think is pretty cool. I’ll be flying home in three weeks for Christmas!